Why Credo? Why Now?
It has been about a year since I founded the Credo organization, and as I reflect, so much good has happened since its inception. If you are reading this in 2021, then you may be wondering how anything good could have came from a year in which a global pandemic crippled nations’ economies, hundreds of thousands of lives were lost, and many individuals and families lost their well-being. You are in good company, because I also wonder myself. The past year hasn’t been without challenges, difficulties, and sufferings both for myself and my family, but I believe that what has been born out of the suffering is a great sense of renewal. Two events in 2020 really changed my life, and I hope that hearing the brief stories can inspire you as well to take a deeper look at what already is in front of you.
Around this time last year, the coronavirus pandemic had forced the closure of businesses around the United States, including religious institutions. The parish I attend was impacted, but they streamed mass virtually through Facebook at the time. A virtual mass was quite different than anything I was used to, and the only times I have ever watched a Catholic mass on the web was when I was too sick to go to church. While it is by no means a routine replacement for physical church services, a virtual mass was necessary in a time of crisis in order to maintain connection to the faith. My wife, Mary, and I watched the mass in our bedroom through our television. The mass progressed through the normal liturgical components, and it wasn’t until the tail end of the homily that I encountered something different than what I had usually received during mass.
The priest closed his homily by saying, “Jesus is with you.” That’s it. It was just four simple words in a simple sentence that hit me like a freight train. The moment he had spoken those words, I instantly became emotional. The emotion was unlike a feeling that you may experience if you get hit with an intense pain. It was not the same emotion that you may feel when losing a loved one. This felt completely different, and it is tough to describe. I can only say that I was overwhelmed with emotion, and it would not let up the rest of mass (~30 minutes left). I have had my share of emotion before, but 30 minutes is a long time for continuous sobbing. This is especially true when you connect the source of it to being four common words that generally would not trigger anyone. Reflecting on that moment now, a few things stand out to me.
First, after I got a hold of my emotions, I felt an intense urge to do something - a call to action. I was highly motivated to start a mission in helping others. This is something that I knew I was called to do my whole life, but I encountered it in the day-to-day. This call to action ultimately had led me to create Credo. The reason behind it though is what is truly the foundation for this ministry: to meet people where they are. While the 2020 version of this may have been described as a virtual ministry, a year of reflection has fine-tuned it. What does it mean to meet someone where they are? It means to actively seek someone or a group of people and connect with them at a level that is most relatable. I believe this is important, because so often we expect others to fall in line with our own wishes. I can name countless examples of this in my own life, but it is not very effective.
Second, this was a call from God. Looking back at this time in my life, this was not something I was interested in, was pursuing, or was even in the right mindset to execute. But when I came out of this experience, I was very passionate about the thought of Credo. This is how I know there was more at work here than my own intuition. God calls us in a variety of ways, some more subtle than others. In this case, this felt like more of a “knock you off your horse” type of experience. And that sentiment is purely from my own personal perspective of my life at the time.
After this experience, I was aggressively trying to pull things together to make Credo happen. Looking back now, I don’t think I needed to move as quick as I did. I believe the call was to get me moving in that direction, but God was not expecting me to solve all the world’s problems in a few months. My life was still not where it needed to be, first off, and secondly, good things take time. I always need a lesson on patience, and this was another excellent example of the need to practice it. Fast forward to August, I had another significant experience that really impacted me, and I believe this experience has changed my life as well as my family’s forever.
My wife, Mary, was gone for a week with her family, and I had the place to myself. I was at work during the day, so the only really change was in the evenings. During that week, I decided to watch a movie. I had seen advertisements for the movie I Still Believe, and it piqued my interest. Given that I am not that up to date with new movies, I thought I’d give it a try. It was a really great decision, and I really enjoyed the movie. Throughout the movie, I reflected on my own life, and the more I did, the more upset I got with myself. I didn’t think I was doing a good enough job as a husband, as a father, as a friend, and so on. The answer to all of those thoughts was you’re right, Chris. You are not where you need to be. After the movie was over, I once again broke down, similar to my experience from earlier in the year. This was a little different in that I was taking an introspective look at my own life…where am I struggling? It didn’t take me long to identify my weaknesses. I sought God’s help and wisdom on what I needed to do. The next step was to make things better.
I spent the rest of the week on a high from this developing an action plan in my mind on how I was going to change. When Mary came back, we had a heart to heart on the experience, and I really opened up to her than I had done our whole marriage. And I tell you, that, in itself, may have been the real game changer. I now had someone to hold me accountable, to keep me in check, in addition to the promise I made to God. From that moment forward, I had changed my life.
I changed my morning and afternoon commutes. Instead of listening to music or news podcasts, I switched to a morning rosary in the car, followed up by inspirational podcasts ranging from Catholic teaching to parenting podcasts. This had really helped my mood, as news podcasts would continually get me fired up every day putting me in a bad mood. Now, I was going to work feeling inspired, and I could carry that into how I came across to my coworkers as well how I performed on the job. Listening on the way home also put me in a better mood for my family. They need a loving, compassionate father/husband, instead of a tired, frustrated man that is not in-tune with his family’s needs. Other things I started doing was attending daily mass a few days a week, which I had really never done my whole life. I picked up responsibility as the leader of our young adult group at our church. I was changing the things in my life that were holding me back.
If you’ve made it this far, I appreciate the time you spent taking to read my story. I’d like to just wrap up with some closing points to think about:
For All:
Pay attention to the subtle changes in your life. These may have more meaning than you realize.
Make intentional time to be with God in prayer or meditation. Just a few minutes a day can make a difference in understanding God’s call.
Take time to understand your weaknesses - what’s holding you back? Everyone has something. Knowing this will help identify which barrier you need to remove to make positive change.
Know that it is never too late to make a change in your life. You can be just off the path or gone completely astray, but God is always ready to accept you back.
Specifically For Men:
Culture has defined what it is to be a man. You shouldn’t show emotions. You need to be strong all the time. Women are always right, so your opinion is worthless. Men are stupid. Men do, and they don’t think. While sometimes the way men are wired may lend to some of these stereotypes, don’t settle for that. The greatest men in history are able to flex to serve the specific needs at the time. They can be physically and emotionally strong when they need, but they also show that they are human and have emotions and weaknesses. It is important for men to acknowledge this. We need more men that are willing to get vulnerable and show a tender, loving side.
One of the structural things I changed in my life from the story above was how I interacted with my wife. Given what I just described above, I would interact with my wife as a stereotypical man. When she would get emotional, I would try to solve her problem without thinking about her emotional needs. And this is true for anyone. If someone is in need, the last thing you need to do right out of the blue is to offer a solution. What they need in the moment is compassion, comfort, and love. Giving that goes a long way and in some cases will naturally lend itself to a solution at the right time. That simple change has changed our marriage. Whether you are married, dating, or single, pay attention to how you interact with others.
This is the year of St. Joseph, earthly father to Jesus. If you have not reflected on Joseph, I would encourage you to do so. Joseph is a great male role model, and he defines what it truly is to be a man and to care for a family.
Be strong. Be faithful. Be tender. Be loving. Be human.
God bless,
Chris Ippolito
